I Remember

I remember now more vividly, with much sorrow, remorse, and pain.

My life with you- all those years, the tears and turmoil, the shame!

I should have left you many, many years ago.

The first time you hit me is when I should have made you go!

Your reasons for calling me a Bitch are still hurtful, vague and unclear.

I should have pushed you away, saying such a thing with my son lying

nearby.

I should have stopped you the night you propelled me to the front door.

Beer dripping from my head, naked, I stood as a misinterpreted whore!

I know you didn’t think I would remember, so much time has gone by.

Yet I can recall feeling so worthless, praying to God to please let me die.

I don’t understand why I couldn’t move, vigorously communicate, or take a stand.

But I know one thing: you were not my life’s soulmate. You were a repulsive,

dreadful little man!

Your demeanor in demoralizing me seemed to work for a significant length

of time.

Gone was my self-respect; my self-love and self-esteem weren’t worth a dime.

You disturbed my sleep, stripping my body each time yours was on the rise.

Your disrespect; was evident; each time you robbed me, that place in me

eventually died.

But you couldn’t get my soul; somehow, God kept that for me.

It wasn’t elementary, but a day came when I could see.

I saw you for who you were, but that was not as bad

As seeing you for who you would continue to be

That’s what made me sad.

I decided to leave you, taking the beautiful five children I had borne.

With some respect in my back pocket, no more was I

Your Physical or Emotional Whore.