I was watching an old episode of ‘Touched By an Angel” (season 9 ep 1) the other day. Part of the episode took place at an old bed and breakfast where a father was desperately trying to repair his relationship with his teenage son.

It wasn’t going well.

The son was carrying years of hurt and anger over things in the past. His wounds ran so deep that he didn’t want to listen to much of what his father had to say.

Then, on top of that, a meteor was set to blast down in the area of the bed and breakfast. The son wanted to go home, to be with his mother and sister. He was afraid. He refused to listen to his father; they needed to stay put. Every attempt his father made to reach him was met with resistance; then, in a fit of rage, the son reached over and punched his father in the face and ran outside.

Once outside, he was determined to go home, run away from his father and the meteor. He decided to steal Andrew’s (another angel) truck. Before he could drive away, Tess, the angel assigned to help him, rushed outside to speak to him. She pleaded with him to do the right thing, hoping to reach the hurt hidden inside beneath his anger.

But he didn’t listen.

He stole the truck anyway.

Now, of course, with Tess being an angel, she could have stopped him, but that wasn’t her assignment.

God gives each of us a FREE WILL.

Tess’s assignment was to guide the teenager. She pleaded with him to do the right thing, but he chose otherwise. And as a result, he got into a little trouble with the truck down the road when he ran over something and the truck started leaking gas.

Thank God Andrew pulled up a while later in a two-seater motorbike. The teenager apologized, and they returned to the bed and breakfast, where he and his father talked things out, and the meteor passed them by. Happy ending.

Watching that scene made me think about how often God places people in our lives to guide us, warn us, and encourage us to choose better paths. Yet, in the end, the choice is still ours. God doesn’t force us to listen. He lovingly gives us the freedom to decide, even when our decisions lead to painful consequences.

As I watched Tess, I realized that’s exactly what I try to do with my own adult children.I try to guide them in the right direction. I pray for them, encourage them, and share the wisdom life has taught me. And believe me, there are times when I’d like to shake some sense into them- but I can’t.

They too have FREE WELL.

Right or wrong, they have the God-given right to make their own choices and live their own lives. As difficult and disappointing as that can be at times, I cannot live their lives for them.

So, I often find myself standing on the sidelines, watching my adult children swim or sink. When they succeed, I rejoice with them. When they stumble, my mother’s heart aches. But I have learned that loving them doesn’t mean controlling them. Sometimes loving them means praying for them, trusting God with what I cannot change, and believing that He is walking beside them when I can’t.